Two Hours of My Life That I Will Never Get Back

11 06 2008

I’ll be brief in explanation:

My mom got Eragon out of the library for me and  my siblings to watch.

Before all you anti-Paolini fiends jump on me, read ahead.  I came up with some amusing alternate titles for the film.

  • Eragon and the Quest for Better Costuming
  • Eragon’s Extremely Awkward “Man” Moments
  • Eragon and the Fifteen Months of Crying Over the Butchering of His Story
  • Eragon, Who Thinks He Can Use A Sword

Anyways.  My biggest problems with the film were these:

Exhibit A: Bad Dialogue

Sorry, Eragon, but your dialogue sucked overall.  And the fact that you were portrayed by a horrible, horrible actor didn’t help matters any.

Exhibit B: Arya

Um, wasn’t she supposed to have dark hair?  She just was kind of sucky overall.  Including the fact that one of the better plotlines from Eldest was laid flat-out for all to see.  Oops.

And, of course, there was the whole thing with the dragon.  A lot of things were just… not… congruent?  No.  That isn’t the word.  Something that I can’t remember.  I’ll see about editing later.





Eragon

23 01 2008

…or not.